Obsession With the End

A large part of what we talked about in my honors class today...am I obsessed with a different end? Not the end of the world, but of this phase in my life? I want to be done - to be out in the world - teaching...but am I ready? I can't picture myself teaching in eight months. I don't feel 'grown up' enough. "Do we ever?" asked Jake today.
"I plan to in a year," I replied, realizing that part of my hesitation at just applying for Teach For America is the fact that I planned to do it in the fall - that this isn't how I planned for my life to happen.
A list of pros and cons is in the works...so many cons, only a few pros of graduating in May, but they're big pros, heavier than the many cons, and they seem to balance out.
There's little risk in just applying unless getting accepted in February and rejecting it could hurt my chances next year...