Burnt
I took the day off today.
In 8 weeks I haven't done that.
I'm living my dream and feeling so...burnt.
By life here, by my school, by the Bronx, by the 'hood', by the culture of violence and noise that surrounds me and my kids EVERY DAY, but mostly by the power of my own expectations and the overwhelming sense of failure that comes from not meeting them.
My ears ring everyday for 15 minutes when I get home.
People around me are quitting. Nearly 10 out of 30 people in my special ed grad class are gone.
Moved...quit....this experience is breaking us and I don't know if I want to be broken for 2 years.
How do I experience this without walking away broken?
Today I requested a transfer to Minneapolis.
In 8 weeks I haven't done that.
I'm living my dream and feeling so...burnt.
By life here, by my school, by the Bronx, by the 'hood', by the culture of violence and noise that surrounds me and my kids EVERY DAY, but mostly by the power of my own expectations and the overwhelming sense of failure that comes from not meeting them.
My ears ring everyday for 15 minutes when I get home.
People around me are quitting. Nearly 10 out of 30 people in my special ed grad class are gone.
Moved...quit....this experience is breaking us and I don't know if I want to be broken for 2 years.
How do I experience this without walking away broken?
Today I requested a transfer to Minneapolis.
posted by Julie @ 12:05 PM
1 Comments:
At 12:38 PM ,
Anonymous said...
More power to you, that's for sure.
Do whatever you need to do, If you're happy - that's all that matters.
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